I wrote a post a few weeks ago with this title (and have since removed it). I was feeling particularly suicidal at the time and was seriously going to end my life at the first opportunity. I couldn’t get it out of my head. I just didn’t want to be here anymore.
I realized that the reason I felt like this is because of my environment and the people around me. Its absolutely toxic. Without going into the details, I’d like to throw some advice out there that might seem pretty obvious to a lot of people, especially other writers:
If something around you is getting in the way of your work, if its cramping or breaking your creative spirit, remove it or remove yourself from it, if you can. My own situation is rather complicated, but I’m trying to remove myself from the toxic environment and people that have helped cause me to want to end my life and are stopping me from writing.
Even doing small things to separate myself from them has worked wonders, I’ve gotten more writing done consistently than I have ever in my adult life.
Its going to take a lot of work but I think I can do it. I want to get out of here so I can spend more of my time and energy doing what I love–writing.