Cat Eyes is a novella I released on Valentine’s Day this year.
I wrote Cat Eyes in high school. At the time, I was sure I had to write urban literature since that’s what it looked like other writers were doing and what my intended audience would be into.
I spent many days writing it by hand (but when it came time to type it up, I wasn’t too thrilled). I shared it with some acquaintances who were no strangers to Zane and was happy when it was received well and I was praised.
Since it was written during my formative years, I still feel very awkward about sharing it with anybody who bothered to look at it. Clicking that publish button on Smashwords was pretty hard…so was the editing. Reading words I wrote years ago is kind of hard for me because I decided somewhere inside to never look back, just keep going forward. I guess I’ve had sad, beautiful life.
I don’t think my main character’s life is sad at all. Harrowing maybe, brutal, violent but not sad. Persian Daniels keeps getting up no matter how many times she is knocked down. She feels her wounds but she doesn’t let it stop her from moving forward to her own wholeness and taking the love she wants.
I ordered the free first edition of my book + shipping and handling, Path of the Righteous, from Lulu. It has been printed and should be on its way by now.
I had the most bizarre nightmare recently. I got the book in the mail…but it was all messed up. The dust jacket had car ads on the inside flap, the book info was missing, and the author photo was gone. The cover picture was all blurred and some pages were hanging out and cut horribly wrong. I woke up thinking this had really happened until I got an e-mail saying the book had shipped!
I guess it was a lucid dream, which I seem predisposed to.
I’m hoping to get the hardback soon so I can take my pencil and do some more editing. Then I’ll publish my first full-length novel at last.
I’m pretty excited and anxious. What does it mean to be published? I’ve known I wanted to write since I was ten and held on to a very specific idea of what “getting published” means. My answer to that question in the past has always been very limited. Endorsement from a major book company or established small book company. Editor. Literary agent. Cover artist. A strong steady following. Attention. Money. People wanting to pick my brain about my stories and learn from me and about me. Now, I don’t know. I feel like I need to get rid of that idea in my own head in order to move forward.
Maybe its because I feel I’ve failed or I’ll never succeed at that particular idealization. But I’m published now, whatever it means. I’ll try to keep moving forward instead of thinking of it the way I used to.
I’ve been in the clouds recently filling orders from my almost-small-business and I’m coming up on the deadline for an offer from NaNoWriMo to its winners to get a supposedly free first edition of one of my manuscripts from Lulu.com..
I have three or so manuscripts that are unfinished but novel length. Path of the Righteous (Book I) is the one I chose.
So I’m in the process of combing through it for as much editing as I can manage then I’m sending it off. As I understand it, I only have to pay shipping and handling for this edition. I had intended to offer this book for free on Smashwords, but what’s the harm in having both? Someone wants to pay for a hard copy, or they just want to read the book without hassle– all sounds fine to me. Believe me, I want to be paid for my work; however, this need conflicts with my beliefs as an artist (that art isn’t something you should have to pay for). So, as a reader and writer, if I read it for free, really like it, and had the money to pay, I’d want a hard copy 😀
Though I know that not everyone thinks like me, I’m “selling myself short”, and should stop giving things away for free (which is also a problem I’m having with my quasi-small business–not charging people what I feel I deserve to be paid for my art crafts).
In addition, I am also releasing a special Valentine’s Day novella–Cat Eyes (one of my older works). More on both books coming soon.